Wednesday, November 2, 2011

A Blizzard Can't Cover My Tears

It has been a very hard 19 hours here at the farm. Not only is Mother Nature giving me a blizzard to contend with but at 10 pm last night after a barn check on the goat girls I carried into the house a very ill Bella... This poor sweet girl has had a hard short life. For those who do not know she was born 2/7/11 to Maggie (a wonderful Mother) but for some reason they where not thriving with her and she gave up taking care of them. So in the fashion of my life in the house the babies came and did fantastic with my attention and care. When Mother Goose lost her baby I brought the girls out and she took to them right away. The girls thrived and I thought life was good. Then the sister to Bella was playing around jumping on and off Mother Gooses back as is common and a freak accident happened - she hit the barn walk and broke her neck. Bella and Mother Goose were so upset that it took weeks to get them back to normal eating and behavior. Bella was doing wonderful with her new Mommy and again I thought life was good. Then Bella developed a bit of a problem belly - not unheard of in a baby who has had so many early issues. However, it was easily treated with a watchful diet and soda. After several months I believed life was good again...

Then on Halloween morning the farm was under attack from a stray dog. As my three dogs tried to chase after it - the dog was chasing and trying to reach my goat girls and babies. Luckily, the hard work of Chief kept it at bay and I went after it with my Shepard's hook and chased it away. So for that day I watched closely that it did not return and that all calmed down with the animals. The bottle kids and Bella where shaking and so frightened that they spent all the time while I was in the barn in my lap and arms crying and shaking. I watched them closely because Wynonna and Goldie are experiencing the runs and Bella was revisited with blot issues. Giving some medication for the runs is the plan for the two and Bella I brought into the house last night to keep a closer eye on her. Let me tell you Mother Goose was not happy but I think she understood the reasons behind it. She gave a lick to Bella's face and talked the whole time as I wrapped her up and started out of the barn. Through thigh high snow we went and reached the kitchen door wet and cold.

Through the night the blot got worse and all my tricks and knowledge including medication was not helping so early this morning I even made the cut to her side to see if that might stop this in it's tracks. I have had to do this to sheep over the years and I read the books again before doing this last ditch effort. It gave her some relief but after the pain left her tummy it was clear that this sweet one was going to pass.. At least it would not be in pain and I would be with her..

She passed in my arms looking up at me. The buckets of tears that have been shed for this girl has been many but the wonderful times far out weight the sadness... I have been lucky to have 8 months with this amazing little girl - I was blessed to save her so many times and with each save give her more time to live the great life of a goat. She was very much loved by her birth mother, her adopted mother and by her human mother. I admit today all I can do is cry for the loss but in my heart I am also remembering all the wonderful times with her. For all those who have over the months wished Bella well I thank you. For those of you reading her story today would you be so kind as to say a prayer for her. While your at it if it is not too much - would you say a couple for the two sweet kids who are still battling their own tummy issues.

Blessings and thank you for letting me share.

10 comments:

Susan said...

Oh, I am so sorry to hear this. I will send healing brayers for your two kids with tummy issues and a good bye prayer for Bella. It is so hard to lose a little one (or any one). I send a prayer to heal the pain in your heart, too.

Ngo Family Farm said...

So sorry, Grace. :( In the Catholic tradition, Saint Francis is the patron saint of animals. I've said many a prayer to him for mine over the years, and so here's asking that he be with you and your animals always, especially today. -Jaime

BLD in MT said...

Oh, what a sad tale, but you are so right to look at the positives, the time you were able to spend, the happiness she brought you. I am sorry for your loss, but I know it is such a blessing that your goats have you to look after and love them. My thoughts for the speedy recovery of the other two!

Jane said...

So so so sorry Grace. You have had such a sad year. I can really see why you could use a year off of kidding. My prayers are with you and all your four legged ones.

Candy C. said...

Oh Grace, my heart breaks for you! I'm so glad you were able to give Bella some relief and extra love when she needed it most.
My prayers are with you and the other two little ones.

Lisa said...

Grace, how very devastating...I'm so sorry for your and the girls.. may little Bella rest n peace. You did more for her than most would have and I think she knew that her time here was because of you and your heart of gold.

tummy issues are so scary.. i hope the little ones get better quickly...

Aprons and More said...

I am so sorry and sad. Please know that we all are praying for the little ones and the farm. They are blessed to have you...

Katy

Kristina said...

I'm so sorry. Prayers going out to you.

larkspur funny farm said...

Thank you so much ladies for your heartfelt words, prayers and blessings. I am still so very sad and going in and out of the barn during the bitter cold last night has wiped me out. No time for feeling sorry for myself - still have sick babies and tons of snow and cold to deal with. I am truly blessed to have you all in my life.
Thanks You!!

Nicole said...

peace and love, grace. my heart goes out to your family <3